A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

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Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

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Q. What do you call a child with no friends or family A. Adopted

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Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

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Women's rights.

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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Q: What was the proctologist doing on the street? A: He was observing the assfault.

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Thank you for flying Buzzy Fly Airlines. Today we'll be flying around Uranus.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

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An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

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Why did the black man purchase a gun? Because the man enjoys to go hunting in his spare time.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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How did the blonde die? She got swallowed whole by a 1,000-foot scorpion.

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Where can I apply for janitor school?

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Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

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Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

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What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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I've got a joke for you. The people writing these jokes. Thats a joke.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops