What's blue, red, and full of metal? Timmy in his favorite blue sweater, after he got hit by a truck.

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What did the west African get for his birthday? Ebola

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Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

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A muslim and a jew walk into a bar. The muslim proceeds to detonate the bomb he had strapped to his chest, killing himself and dozens of bar patrons.

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What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

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A man walks into a bar, the other man ducks.

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What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

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A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and gives a heavy sigh. The bartender asks, "What's wrong?" The guy says, "Nothing."

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Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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Why can't february march Because april may

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3 men walk into a bar, and the fourth guy behind them had the sense to duck under it.

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The continent of Africa is mired in corruption, poverty, food crises, disease, and the exploitation of its resources. Happy Kwanzaa

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Jack and Jill went up a hill to snort a little coke, Jack felt horny , so did Jill. But unfortunately Jack cant's maintain an erection no matter how turned on he is.

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Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy i have alzheimers hey i just met you

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a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it has a serious crack addiction and there was a drug dealer on the other side.

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Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops