What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

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how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

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What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

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What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

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What did the black person say to the white person I'm black your white

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Q: How can you tell when your selling a Blondel a microwave A: she will keep asking how many chandler the Tv gets

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A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

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You got yourself a mole, I suggest you restrict all access to any and everyone that could possibly go under aliases such as: The Wiz. Azure. Dungeon Lord. Dice. Wizard, and anything similar, he is most likely a computer geek which does not necessarily look like one.

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

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Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

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What did the white boy say to the black boy? You're black

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Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

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How many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. It really isn't that hard.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

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What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

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Two guys walk into a bar, but the third guy is a duck.

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

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Why did the boy fart on his sister? Because he was sitting on her, and happened to pass gas.

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala.

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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