Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

Why was the man choking? He was eating to fast.

How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

Why did nobody like Anne? She was disabled

So Nero, what the fuck are you doing? XD

This week only, 2 for 1 misdemeanor shop lifting arrest. How can I do it? Because I can.

What do dogs and keyboards have in common? Nothing.

A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. It's also a bistro, and they have a lovely lunch together.

sfdg

what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

One man says to the other man "Hello Sir, how are you this morning?" He replies "I am doing rather well, and how are you?" The first man replies "Quite good." And they continue about their day.

Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

What do you call a terrorist on 9/11? A terrorist.

What did one Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I would tell you but i don't speak Chinese therefore i have no way of translating it for you

Why did the woman have an abortion? Because she was raped at the age of 17.

Which does does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

Yo Momma so fat, that she need the atlantic to take a bath!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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