Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

A cat playing laser tag.

A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

What's black and can't swim? A black shirt.

What did the bartender say to the man? can i have a beer if you dont get it the bartender asked the customer for a beer

Whats worse then any minority? The fact they still exist.

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

I love alchohol!

Two muffins are in an oven. And by muffins I mean jews. They both die a horrible death.

a Gay Man Walks Into A Bar And See's its Only Women In There, He Screams And Leaves

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died from chlamydia.

whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

Why wasnt the black man entitled to a social welfare cheque? Because he made quite good money at a nearby hospital, where he worked as a doctor

#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

A Muslim on a plane yells out "Hijack!" Jack replies with "Hello" and the two engage in a casual conversation for the duration of the flight.

Why was the man denied access to the college Because he did not have good grades in the past.

Have you seen Andrea Bocelli's new house? No. He hasn't either.

Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

What do you call a man with an eight foot steel spike wedged in his rectum? An Ambulance

thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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