What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

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you know whats better than lemonade? sex

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What time is it when an elephant jumps over your fence? Actually, elephants don't jump.

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why did the boy fall back wards? he was shot dead

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What do you call a black man doing his taxes? A well respected member of society

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I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

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Whats black, white, and Asian all at the same time? A panda

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Your legs are more open than my back door! Which is closed.

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Boy: what to hear a joke? girl: sure. Boy: woman rights.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? To get to the other side!

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a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

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theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

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What do you call a girl with ADD and too much free time? Me

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everyone wonders y grandmas dont wear bra's its because if youre that old u might die putting it on

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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What is funny about a cod swimming around alone in the ocean? Nothing, over-fishing is a huge problem in the modern day.

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Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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