Wanna hear something dirty? Mud.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is green and fuzzy and when it falls from a tree, your dead? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one underneath it. What's worse than that? It has to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It goes back for seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

thumb_up thumb_down -5

An African American walks into a bar. The bar tender is a racist, so he asks the African American gentleman to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the girl stop running? Because she is in a wheelchair and will never walk again

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato!!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock Knock Who's there? Your a slut

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's Kanye West's goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a man with a limp? A limping man.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red Violets are blue Violets are actually purple or white

thumb_up thumb_down -5

2 gays monkeys walk into a bar.........

thumb_up thumb_down -5

don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock knock. "Who's there?" "It's Mr. Johnson, your next door neighbor." "Come on in."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Lindsay Lohan

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what happened when the boy jumped? he landed

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops