I was walking down the street the other day And I pushed a child under a bus

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Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

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what's worse, ten babies stapled to a tree or one baby stapled to ten trees?

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on a scale from voldemort to nigel thornberry, how big is your penis?

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Q: What did jerry sandusky do with little boys alone? A: Teach them how to play football

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

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Your momma is so black, that her melanin levels are relatively high.

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What looks like a lion, sounds like a lion, and feels like a lion? A lion Ba dum chh

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What does Mitt Romney approve of flip flops? They feel good on his feet.

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trash can 1 baby in 10 trash cans

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why did the chicken cross the road? to try and stop the rapist from sodomizing his young child but his atempts were futile as the rapist shot him and used his blood as lubricant when he skull-raped his dying wife

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Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

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Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

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What did the doctor say to the obese person? You have diabetes.

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their was a black man in my family tree hes still hanging on

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There once was a man named Trevor. Trevor was walking casually through the forest one day. All of a sudden, a wolf leapt out from the trees. The wolf said, in a harsh voice, "Hey man! This is my patch". But then Trevor woke up and realised that his hallucinations were symptoms of a degenerative brain disease.

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There are two angry guys in a park on their lunch break What do they do? They eat their sandwich and go back to work to settle a peace treaty.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Actually, violets are violet

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road. He didn't, this joke gets old really fast

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Q:Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A:Sea creatures seeking shelter and food

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Let's get some comments on this one! Everyone add a comment with a quote from a movie! I'll thumbs-up the best comments!

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What did the man say to the other man. Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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