Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

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A man and a woman are having sex. The man finishes and says, "Oh, God, I hope you're on the pill." The girl says she isn't and begins to cry. Lacking a job or a stable life, the man leaves the woman. The woman has an abortion and suffers irreversible damage to her ovaries.

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A woman walks into a bar.

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What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

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What did the Rabbi get for Christmas? Nothing because as you know Rabbi's are members of the Jewish community and therefore don't celebrate Christmas.

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roses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a motorcycle nothing, I dont have either

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you that read wrong no you typed it wring my mind just rearranged the words to make grammatical sense

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A: Knock Knock B: Come in A: Come in Who B: Your Mum...

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Why doesn't a duck's quack echo? Evolution.

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What did the plane say to the twin towers? Boom

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A dyslexic woman wears a bar.

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Q: Why did you get raped last week? A: Because at night you touch yourself to pictures of rapists.

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If i wanted your 2 cents i'd rob you

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A man with two broken legs walks into a bar.

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Why Did the man Commit suicide? His body used cellular respiration to make ATP (A form of energy) and his body used it to send electrical signals to his index finger to pull the trigger on his .357 Magnum, thus putting a bullet through the soft tissue in his brain causing his body to shut down Imediately!

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A priest, a rabbi, and an iman all walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, some kind of joke? Muslims don't drink beer."

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What does a baby sound like being cooked in the microwave. I don't know I was to busy masterbating.

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What has no eyes no arms no legs and the lack of a brain? You for liking this joke

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why was Logan sad? he was raped by his daddy multiple times

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What did the horse say to the farmer who tried to feed him hay soup? I don't like that.

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Why has 8 wheels and costs more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

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If a red house is made out of red bricks, and a blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is a green house made out of? Green bricks.

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Dad: hi son Kid: (looks sad and looks at the ground) Dad: what's wrong son. Kid:I raped a girl. Dad:Who? Did you rape son! Kid:mom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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