What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

You read this in school as the kid sitting next to you stares at his computer screen.

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, He gave me AIDS, And I gave them to you!

What's awesome about going to a no-pants party? Getting stabbed 2 times.

Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

Why is the Mexican a gardener? He has a mental disability that makes him unable to do more than a simple task.

A guy walked into a store and bought a candy bar. Why? Because he wanted some chocolate.

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Doctor" "Interrupting Doc-" "You have Cancer'

What do you call it when an Arabic man gets shot? Murder.

A man walked into his house He saw his wife having an affair with his teenage Gardner

A van drives into a car.

Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Orange is orange

what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

A tortoise went for a run. It took him two hours to get around the corner.

You and your parents are going to die today

One day little billy was wandering happily through the forest.He then trips and his legs disintegrate

Terraria

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

A group of blondes rent a car and decide to drive to Disney World. Along the highway, they see a sign reading "Disney World left." They exit the highway, turn left, and enjoy their well-deserved vacation from practicing law.

"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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