where do some birds live in? Earth

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What did the blond do on October 12th? Get hit by a bus

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How do you get Vladamir Putin to smile? You tickle him.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

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What do you get when you mix Obama and Chief Keef? OBLLAMA

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

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How many tacos does it take to feed an angry person? You better tacover it!

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What's worse than a pimple? Finding out it's a botfly.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

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Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

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What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

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Q: What were little Jonathon's grandmas last words before dying of Alzheimer's? A: Who are you?

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9 8 7

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What's so great about twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

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What's long hard and full of seamen? A boat, or possibly a submarine.

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Why did Dr. Phil fall of the swing? He couldn't figure out the couples problem.

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I don't have ADHD I just- Hey look a squirrel!

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

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What do you call a hindu that has radiation poisoned A radiatative hindu

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

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I'm currently on a seafood diet That is, I only eat seafood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops