Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

why is pie good. because it just is.

When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

How do you make a Chef cry? You kill his family.

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

Why did the girl go to the hospital? She had an asthma attack.

If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

21

Why couldnt Jimmy ride a bike? refrigerator

roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

Yo mama so stupid she was trying to put her M&M's in alphabetical order

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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