Why did old Dorris shit herself? Because Margaret fell over.

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Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

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Why did the trombone player have sex so often? Because he was hot.

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So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

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Why was the prostitute's throat sore? Allergies.

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One,two,skip a few... five,six,seven,eight...(and so on ad infinitum)

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

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Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

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What did the penguin do in the desert? He died .

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

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Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

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Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

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What do you call a plane in shining armor? A knight flight.

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Do you like fishsticks? Yes I personally think they are high in saturated fats, but to each his own Oh I thought you were asking if I was homosexual

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What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

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What do you get when you mix Jabba the Hut with a hen? nothing, genetically they are unable to reproduce due to the disproportionate number of chromosomes and DNA

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Why did Michael Jackson become white? He thought he saw a ghost.

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one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

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Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

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What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson? A collision, if Michael Jackson were alive.

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Why do black people like fried chicken?? Because it was fried

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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