What's the difference between a lion and a stuffed lion? One is for children to play with, one will eat you alive.

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, he malfunctioned and strangled him. Despite the authorities best efforts to free the kid, he was still strangled because robots are really strong. After killing the boy, the robot self destructed and leveled 5 city blocks everyone within the vicinity was killed.

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Why did Johnny's pants fall down? Because he was fat.

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We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

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What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

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what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

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Why did Billy fall over? Because someone tripped him.

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What do you call a Jew in the oven? The oven repair man

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Your mother just died.

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Brian: Have you seen my slippers? Louise: What the hell are you doing in myhouse? Help ! Police! Brian: You have amnesia like in that film 50 first dates Louise: What film? I don't remember that Brian: Exactly

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8===D

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How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

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THE GAME

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Whats a hobbo's favorite food? Trash

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What did the mom say to her daughter? I love you.

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I have 20 dollars and 27 cents. How much money do I have? 20.28$ I found a penny.

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

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A man walks into a bar. Sup.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

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while having sex, the boy asked, "how many ears do elephants have?" his father answered, "two"

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My dad is lactose intolerant. He shouldn't eat cheese.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops