Your mother is so ugly corrective surgery would not be able to improve her appearance

Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

why did the boy die? because he got shot

Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

Why is the Holocaust/Worm in your apple joke the highest rated joke on Anti Jokes? Most of the viewers of this website clicked on a thumbs up symbol directly below the joke, which by the coding of this website triggered an algorithm that caused the number adjacent to this thumbs up button to increase and also caused the joke to appear higher on the list of most popular jokes.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

Roses are red Violets are violet Don't know why people are saying they're blue

What do you call a squirrel in my yard? Dead.

Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

What's the color of the sky when an airplane takes off? Blue. What are you, stupid?

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because black people are usually stronger than chicken. If they weren't, chickens would probably eat fried black people.

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

Whats worse than being fat? Being Rebecca Black

How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

Roses are red Violets are? blue Lets eat poo I know you want to

Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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