There once was a boy walking down the street. He got shot in the head. He died.

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How do you scare a little boy? You tell him everyone he loves was shot to death by you and then kick his guardian .

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Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

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What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

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I used to be able to walk, but then I took an arrow to the knee. It tore my acl and shattered my kneecap.

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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Someone with a lame joke: What's black and white and red all over? Smart person who decides to mess with him: Nothing, if it is red all over how can it be black and white???????

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Mini mouse was brutally killed n Oakland Now Mickey is a Chinese member of the crips in Compton Remember don't forget to see the new Disney movie, Mickey Goes Gang-Bangin

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what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

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Why did the boy not get picked up from soccer? His mom was in a fatal car accident. His dad simply forgot.

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You got yourself a mole, I suggest you restrict all access to any and everyone that could possibly go under aliases such as: The Wiz. Azure. Dungeon Lord. Dice. Wizard, and anything similar, he is most likely a computer geek which does not necessarily look like one.

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How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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Q: How could the black man afford to buy a TV? A: He had a well-paying job and a supporting family.

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So much with being an author... You with the Feds? The CIA?

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A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

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Wha....You probably shouldnt read the rest of this because i lie a lot (This joke deserves lots of thumbs and comments!)

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun.

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how do you kill a giraffe? shoot it

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What's the difference between michael jackson and casey anthony? Michael jackson's dead.

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A grandma writes to her young grandson every day over e-mail with funny lines and pictures,He shows his parents a joke she sent him it reads- "A guy walks into a bar.. He says ouch" They then read on and call the police.They say "Son go to your room.. you're being stalked by a pedophile.. Your grandma has been dead since last year.. we are sorry"

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Charles Manson is innocent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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