Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

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If god himself had a religion he would be a self centered bastard.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

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What does these 3 words all have in common? terrifiant, hrollvekjandi, Przera?aj?ce They all mean the same thing describing Ian! CREEPY

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Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

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Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

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Why is 13 the most hated number? 13 is Jewish.

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when you smile the whole world stops and stares for a while because you have one tooth and its half chipped.. and your a black mexican red head.

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Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

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aodhan hearty

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What did the dinosaur say to the caveman? Nothing. Dinosaurs were wiped off the earth due to a tragic, world wide extinction about 65 million years ago while small mammals which would eventually evolve into humans survived.

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-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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What happens when a man runs naked into a bank? He doesn't get service because he isn't wearing shoes or a shirt

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

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What do you call a lawyer without a brain? -Dead

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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What do you call a cow lying on a barn floor? A cow

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Can midgets still have big dreams?

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Whats the defination of cruelty

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When lives gives you lemons you might just be dyslexic, because life cannot actually give you lemons

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A young boy walked into a hardware store and asked for a long weight. Luckily, the shop owner was kindly and brought the child up to speed on the process of hazing.

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What has got 56 eyes, 1 leg and 3 arms ? I don't know but that's right behind you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops