What's the difference between an elephant and a duck? Purple.

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What do you call a doctor without a head? Deceased

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tim has no humor

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

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A blonde is walking down the road, and she sees a sign saying STOP. She carries on walking. As a pedestrian, the sign does not apply to her.

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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Whats worse than spilling the milk? Getting raped by the easter bunny.

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A jewish man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder, the bartender asks "where'd you get that" the man replied "at a pet shop"

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what's black, white, and red all over? a penguin stuck in a blending machine

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Whi can't John sleep? Because he is dead!

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Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Another man asks him if hes ever seen the new movie that came out. he then replies, "i heard it" then curled up into a ball and cries for several hours.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? The Holacoast

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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Boy, is it hot this summer! How hot is it?! So hot that many people have died as a result!... Drink plenty of water.

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what did the dog say when he walked in to a bar? Bark

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knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

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Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

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Roses are red.........I slept with someone else

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What did the Rasta man say when he got his dread stuckin the toilet ?

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Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops