Girl:Do you wanna hear a joke? Boy:Sure... Girl: jesus loves you

thumb_up thumb_down -6

An Irish man, Scots man and a Welsh man walk into a bar. The barman says, "what is this some kind of joke?!" Peter, who lives in Cardiff, returned home, depressed that he is viewed as some sort of clown. It reminded him of when he was a school boy; a giant spot appeared on his nose. The kids just laughed at him. "Don't worry Peter" he said to himself, "It will all be over now... He later hung himself. His family have been informed.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Scenario - Two astronauts are kayaking down the Sahara dessert. Question - How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse? Answer - Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do men like most of all? Let's not lie, BOOBIES!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the chicken cross the road It was being dragged to the other side by fox It's the way of life _._._

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a deer with one eye? Nothing. The deer was transported to a specialist animal hospital and now has two working eyes, eliminating the purpose of this joke. We apologise for wasting your time.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A pirate walks into a bar with a wheel on his crotch, and the bartender says, "What's that?" and the pirate says, "A deadly tumor."

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

so a boy walks into a bar he was underage and escorted out.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Rape

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops