Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

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Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

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How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

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Why did the cow cross the road? -Because it lives in India and is allowed to.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

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Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bicycle.

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Why did the redneck leave his wife? To marry his daughter.

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

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What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

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An American, a German, and a Mexican walk quickly into a room. They were late for a work meeting.

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Two guys are walking on a bridge. One has long hair. The other does not care.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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If everyone in China jumped up and down at the same time they would lose all credibility as a nation for organising such a pointless excursion.

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Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

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it was all Tagart

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What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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