what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

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Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

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Where did Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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how man

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

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I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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Why is this the worst joke ever? Because it isn't even funny.

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What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

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i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

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Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

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What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But his one doesn't.

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A man walks into a bar he's drunk and can't feel it But he's ok

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Black people having a Job.

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A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

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What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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There is a Mexican, American, and an Italian on a boat.They start to sink. All of them brought things from their country. The Mexican threw burritos over and said, "We have too much of these." The American threw american cheese over and said, "We have too much of these in our country." The Italian throws over pizza and says the same thing. They are still sinking. Then, the American picks up the Mexican, throws him over and says, "We have too much of these in our country."

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Your Mom was so fat he made herself Liposuction Twice

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Slug on ya tooth Gavin David Newman

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My childhood friend said she had a bad breakup with her husband (yeah husband), and that she needed a really stiff one. Come on! How was I supposed to know she was talking about alcohol! She did blush and smile after I pulled my pants down however, that`s like seven out of ten right? I mean I was just trying to help a friend out right? And myself, fine myself, but it will be a total win/win situation, you know... Those where you win twice? "Dont worry, Im not comming" *pewpew*

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Why did the blonde make pasta even though she had a gluten allergy? She had some Italian friends coming over. Also she bought some gluten-free pasta and sauce so she wouldn't need to be hospitalized.

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Q: When birds fly in a "V", why is one side always longer? A: There is one extra bird on that side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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