How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

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What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Two holocausts.

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Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

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Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

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What has 17 eyes, 43 toes, 11 feet and, 9 heads? A 17 eyed- 43 toed- 11 footed- 9 headed monster.

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A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

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Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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Who is the greatest cook ever? Adolof Hitler

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

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If Tigger was a black panther Christopher Robin would have named him Nigger.

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u know whats a crime? rape

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Q: Why are black people black? A: Cause they're from Africa.

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Once upon a time, Ducks THE END

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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What did the old man say to kid who was begging to his mommy? Shut up.

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It was a beautiful day. Face.

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A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for some water. The bartender replies: "Sorry, we don't have any." The man responds: "Sorry, I'm drunk." He walks out.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

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Two latino men are drinking at a bar. Suddenly, one man falls off his barstool, unconscious. Later that day, he was diagnosed with pancreatitis, and died never having dealt with his severe alcoholism.

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why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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Twelve men walk into a bar, and get stuck in the door because it's far too small for all of them to walk through at the same time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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