Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's the capital of Ohio? O

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

a lady says, " i cant stand this." Th guy next to her had his legs blown off and will never be able to stand again.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Three Jews get on a train to Stockholm. How many get off at Stockholm. None. The train went straight to Auschwitz.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the douche bag get for Christmas? Your girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A black man walks into a house and is shot because it is not his house and it is 2 in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Next up, Sharpi and Ryan take their audition faliure very seriously in "columbine high school musical"

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the squirrel fall out the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out the tree? It was stapled to the first squirrel Why did the the third squirrel fall out the tree? Peer pressure Why did the fourth squirrel fall out the tree? It thought it was a game Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a squirrel Why did the postman die? He got hit in the head by four squirrels and a tree

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops