What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

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What did the Albino get for Christmas? Hair dye.

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If you can't see what I see... You must be blind. If you can see what I see... Well I can't be blind because I have been able to see all my life!

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Please don't shoot me

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Man: Did it hurt? Woman: huh? Man: Did it hurt when i killed your family?

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roses are rose, violets are violet, now shut up, you retarded black poet!

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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Lets Go Lakers!

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What´s Green and turns Red at your Finger Tips? Frog in a Blender.

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An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

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Who would be an amazing GOP VP? Chris Christie -Mitt Romney

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Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

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how do you stop a rhino from charging? you shoot it with a gun until it's either dead or no longer charging at you because thats a highly dangerous situation.

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Why was the kindergartener crying in the corner? His family was poor and his father abused him.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball? A blonde is a human woman and a bowling ball is an inanimate object used for the popular sport of bowling.

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what do you call a Mexican driving a plane? a pilot you were probably to racist to work that out

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because her family lived in the countryside and her family's income was very far below average and in the time of her miraculous breakthrough, automobiles were for the wealthy families and obviously her family was not wealthy. She wouldn't have been able to drive even if she wasn't blind or def. The economy pretty much hated her and her family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

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What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

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A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

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A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

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What's the difference between a Jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your balls with a Jew.

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What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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