- Anti Joke

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

how many dirty stinkin apes does it take to put in a lightbulb? 3 dirty stinkin apes, 1 dirty stinkin ape to put in the lightbulb and 2 dirty stinkin apes to throw feces at each other

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a crap?

what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

Tool will release their 5th album this summer.

This is one LONG empty space isn't it?

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What do you get we you mix a ginger with gasoline? A forest fire.

Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

DUH DUH DUH DRAMATIC HAMSTER

I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

what's white and sticky semen

What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

What is 33 + 1? Penis

what is 3+3= 8

9/11