Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

a man paints himself yello shrinks himself and walks into a baber shop then he relizes that the sizers are yello so he gets cut up into shreds and dies. THE END!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the christian go into the church? To pray.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man builds a time machine but can only travel back in time. Where does he go? Irrelevant. Time and space exist on different planes.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school? Both of his legs were amputated. He can't ride a bike ever again.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I was asking you...

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I am tying up hostages. - Ethan R. 2015

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's as hard as a rock? A rock

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Did you know Hellen Keller had a swingset? No I didn't. Ya it was actually really nice.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did Steve say when his leg got chopped off? Nothing, he went into a state of shock before blacking out due to loss of blood. Later on, he died, and a week later, a funeral was held, in which nobody showed up, because nobody cared for Steve.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you do with a leg less dog? Take him for a drag.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you stop the London riots? - You employ a a highly effective police tactic to diffuse the crisis as quickly as possible.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops