A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of tequila. He later goes home drunk and beats his wife. His wife is getting a divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Elephants can't jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mom is so fat, she weighs 732 kilograms.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Eating the apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a black man, a jew, a mexican and an irish man walked into a bar and the bartender says: This is joke right??

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Doctor, everybody despises me. That cant be totally true you despicable piece of shite!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats the difference between males and females? fe

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

the NAACP

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks into an insane asylum and says hello-The inmates assault him with mindless babble. A man walks into an insane asylum and says argblthenthrozaphowea-The inmates say hello.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A Man thought it was a good day and to go on anti-joke.com then he saw a post that had a link. This man was you and the link was http://minedgamez.tk/beta/ The man then clicked the link and fucking laughed so hard xD. She died in a car crash. Then a pickle appeared. It was then eaten by you not realizing it was actually a hamster.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the man die when he saw the light? It was a strobe light and he died from an epileptic seizure

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops