What do you call a bright orange fish? A gold fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why was the boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walk briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the cop pull the black guy over because he was speeding

thumb_up thumb_down +5

anti jokes are really funny

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the coolest place to be in the solar system? Uranus.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happened when the blonde girl threw a grenade? The enemy pulled the pin and threw it back

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between a ferrari and pile of dead babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what did the African kid get for his birthday AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was the trash man feeling sad about his life? Because he had a mild case of depression to which his doctor recommended taking antidepressant pills.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

whats worse than someone blowing out all your birthday candles? a piano dropping on your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the chicken cross the road? Scholars maintain that the translations to the chickens journal were lost in a hurricane hundreds of years ago. Therefore, the chicken crossed the road for unknown reasons and died knowing it had a dull, pointless life.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Women's Rights..

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops