What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

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Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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Your mom is so old she died

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What did the man say before he got stabbed? What are you going to do, stab me?

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school? Both of his legs were amputated. He can't ride a bike ever again.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

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How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

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whats the difference between a black guy and a park bench? well a park bench is an inanimate object that people use to sit on and feed the birds at the park. and a black guy is a living being who is looked down upon in society.

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If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

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BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Unless she's particularly short, then she may need to get a friend, who may or may not be blonde, to help by holding the ladder.

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What did God say to Abraham? Nothing, because God doesn't exist.

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A guy with cancer walks into a bar... No one treated him any special way, it's not like he had I have cancer written on his forehead.

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A- Why did the chicken cross the road? B- I honestly do not care.

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What you you call peanut butter on the top of a dog house Peanut butter

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Or so the tell me, Because I'm Blind

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Moose A: What do you call a moose with diapers on its head? Moose B: Me.

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how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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