Q: why did the prisoner drop his soap? A: easy sex

Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

What did the parents say to their kid? You're adopted and we don't love you.

Why was the hiker upset? He was plummeting 1,500 feet to the ground after tripping on a rock too close to a cliff.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because goats lay eggs.

69

What did the German say to the Rabbi? Hello. The German was also Jewish

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple

A man walked in a bar and asked for 10 shots. (not descriptively) The bar tender got his gun out and shot the man 10 times. Another man asked for three stabs at it. The bar tender stabbed him 3 times. The last man asked for a bomb load. The bar tender gave him 100's of granades. Then the man bombed down the bar with the bar tender inside

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

What do you call a black priest? Holy s***

how many black men did it take to steal from the whitehouse? Obama.

How do you scare a little boy? You tell him everyone he loves was shot to death by you and then kick his guardian .

What goes up and down, up and down, up and down, forever? An insult to Newtonian physics.

How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

Women age like a fine wine: sediment develops as they lose their tannins, and earthy notes of oak and mineral develop in their flavor profile, giving them a lengthened finish.

Why did the black man enjoy KFC. Because like many foods, it contains monosodium glutamate (MSG) a flavor enhancer that makes many foods taste better. It however had nothing to do with race or cultural background.

Why is 5 the best number? Because it's alive!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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