Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

Why was the family sad? Their house burnt down.

What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

guess wat chicken butt guess why chicken thy guess who chicken poo guess how he chickened out

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

emma brown i did tap that shit -jackson edwards

What's worse then the WNBA? Nickelback.

Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

Nerochan, it was really nice chatting with you, I hope we can chat some other time... Please tell me why you are upset with me, just pick up the phone, I mean let me know what I did you wrong.

How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

If youre African, why are you white?

Why can't Vampires go out in the sunlight? Because they don't exist.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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