roses are red violets are blue bullets are lead now i shoot you

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Whats not funny and no one wants to waste the time to reading it? This joke

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What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

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What do you call a group of black men stampeding down a hill? Dangerous, so they should slow down!

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Knock knock! Who's there? A Doorbell salesman.

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Why do dyslexic people stink at typing? c k j a h s d i u p q h g n z v m n k b e r t y o f This is why...

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Why did the girl cry when her boyfriend brought up the topic about rape? Because she was raped by her father as a child and it was a suppressed memory.

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What is worse than a sharknado? A bullcano.

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Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

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tommy is retared

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How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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Q: How do Hellen Keller's parents punish her? A: They give her a timeout

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Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

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Communism hehe xd

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Why did the student get the math question wrong? -Because hes dead

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PENIS

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What's tall black and has curly hair? A black guy

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I baked a pie once. Guess what flavor it was. PIE FLAVOR!

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why does my face bleeding theres an axe in it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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