How do u get an A on your test. U lock your teacher in the closet.

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A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What did the pony say when it lost its voice? Nothing. Ponies are incapable of speech.

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Actual jokes are now obsolete.

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What did the zombie eat for breakfast? You. You fell a-sleep

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Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

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Why did Madona rub shit on her vagina? Because she was horny.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

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What happened to to dyslexic giraffe that tripped over a brick. It got back up.

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What do you call black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist bastard

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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Three blind mice. See how they run. Into things.

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What happen when Sarah made but her nose in other people's business? Her vagina got set on fire by cole and derrek shoved your head up his ass!

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Sir, your wife is dead

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Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

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How do you keep someone in suspense? Refuse to let them view the resolultion of a gripping film.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I kinda have a bad memory What are we doing again?

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Why did Little Suzy get hit by a truck? Well the real question is, "Why was Little Suzy in the road," so why was she? Because she felt like it.

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The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

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What has hands but can't clap? - A Quadraplegic

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roses are red violets are blue i have dementia its not funny

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Is a tomato a vegetable? Depends if it is comatose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops