What has a black, blue, and red all over? Timmy. He was mugged, and vigorously raped.

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Who went shopping on Saturday? There is a reason I put a question mark there, so you guys could reply. Not so I could respond myself.

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How come Helen Keller never played professional baseball? Because she was a woman

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Where's Wally? In a children's book.

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How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

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whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

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Some guy pretends to be Santa on the street. He touches a little girl and says "It's okay i'm Santa" So the pedophile Santa molestes the little girl. The little girl goes home and says that Santa touched her so the parents go looking for this guy. And then they find out he died of a heart attack.

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing it had his tongue

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What looks like half an Apple? The other half.

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Why did the door close on little Timmy? He was getting gang raped.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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Why did a car full of African-American men pull up to a lonely white man walking on the sidewalk at 12 p.m. in Harlem? To ask for directions.

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why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

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Two fish were lying on a bank. One said "I can't breath." The other one was dead.

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Your dad isn't gay...but his boyfriend..HES REALLY GAY!

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If X = 3 and Y = 7, what is X + Y = ? It doesn't matter. You forgot to put your name on the test which means you got an automatic fail.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of tequila. He later goes home drunk and beats his wife. His wife is getting a divorce.

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What has 3 eyes, green fur and blue ears? Nothing.

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Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

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A horse walks into a bar Barman: Why the long face? Horse: just had a stroke

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knock knock who's there the police you're under arrest for the kidnapping, and murder of 12 girls you have the right to remain silent anything you say or do can and will be used against you in the court of law

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What did the two prostitute say to each other? I dont know, i wasn't there

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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