So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

what did the whale say when he came out of the water? BLAHHRRAHAHHAAARRRAER

A white guy jumps over the fence belonging to a Mexican family

why did the girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? A wheelchair

A man wakes up in the hospital after being in a car accident. He begins to yell "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor hurries into the room to find out why the patient is yelling. The doctor then promptly explains that this was due to the crash severing his spinal cord and rendering him paraplegic for the rest of his life. The doctor after explaining this states he'll never walk again, before leaving the patient's room.

So a guy goes to his doctor because he thinks he has an STD. He asks the doctor "how bad is it doc?" to which the doctor replies "Well, I got the test results and it doesn't look good. You've got chlamydia, gonorrhea, and onomatopoeia. The guy asks "What's onomatopoeia?" The doctor replies "It's exactly what it sounds like"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Actually, violets are violet

A dyslectic man walks into a bra. It was dark and he didn't see the laundry his wife hanged on the clothes line.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Why couldn't the boy talk? He drowned.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

What has a black, blue, and red all over? Timmy. He was mugged, and vigorously raped.

Why was Johnny so sad His father beat his mother

What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

What is the good thing about having sex with KL..... Nothing because she is a fat man

Where's Wally? In a children's book.

A rat and a pig rape a puppy. Hey, that's just life.

What happened when the engineering student studied for a physics final? They failed.

How come Helen Keller never played professional baseball? Because she was a woman

So 185 cowboys walk into a bar and the bartender says "I can't serve 185 cowboys!" The cowboys ask why not and the bartender says "Because that would exceed the legal maximum occupancy of this building."

Why can't february march Because april may

How did the Nazis torture someone? They inserted a glass tube in the penis and flicked the end so that it shattered.

Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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