Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? Vegeta got rid of the scouter because a monocle built for displaying a person's physical abilities in numbers is extremely farfetched and he didn't want to be a part of a super race of supreme beings that still relied on such ridiculous antics

What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse becomes depressed. He didn't ask to look like this. He drinks himself into a stupor, and then crashes into another car on the highway on the way home, killing a family of five. The horse is now in jail for life.

Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

Who comes up with terrible jokes and then mentions the name of the person they are talking about like a bitch? Both of us, Dylan.

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

So there is a blind man... and he walks past a fish market and takes a deep breath and says"Oh boy it sure does smell like fish out here".

What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

Harry to Voldemort: Your mother is so fat, her patronus is a cake!

Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

2 guys shot up a morgue..... 13 bodies remain dead.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock? Who's there? Not Mary.

Why did 3 kids mom's die last year? Because they were depressed and committed suicide.

Women deserve equal rights.

What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

A horse walks into a barn.. The farmer says "why the long face?",This frightens the horse ultimately leads to the farmer getting kicked in the teeth

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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