What did the man say to the other man. Hi

person 1: Do you have a christmas necklace I could borrow for a party? person 2: I have a one with a leprechaun.

Knock Know Who's there? Not your dog, he just got run over.

What's more fun that being raped? Not being raped.

How many dead hookers can you fit in a trunk? Five

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

Why did Billy run away from a mysterious adult? He was playing the iconic game known as tag where 2+ people chase each other in an attempt to tag them.

Q: How do mentally retarted people read books A: They dont

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

How many People does it take to change a lightbulb? One

What do you call a frog with a bow tie? Cute!

what was the last pizza place the twin towers ordered from? Domino's

What song did Buddy the elf sing for Santa on his birthday? Happy birthday

a gay man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out for trying to seduce men.

My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

A man comes home to his wife sleeping with their neighbor. This lead to their divorce four months later.

Why could the penguin not fly? It was shot in the wing.

Roses are red Violets are black Why is your chest as flat as your back?

Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

whats worse than a friend asking you if their ugly, telling them to look in the mirror.

Why did you not just "put a spell" on her instead? And you are totally mean, ever actually killed someone?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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