Jesus: I will return. Hitler: Well I am back... Nazi as in Nazireth Bush: As I said I was elected by Gawd. Me: What? What about me? Seriously why did I put myself here? Id have three bullets with them in a room, and id still shoot you six times.

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How do you tell when your dog is dead? I don't know. I never had a dog and my parents beat me.

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Why does no one like fat people? Because of Jesse Ziegenbein

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Why is purple the best color. Cuz icecream has no bones

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What do you call a midget cripple with cerebral palsy? Unfortunate

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Yo mama is so fat, she lost in a race to a person who had less physical mass.

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how do you get a man with a gun out of your house? you don't.

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What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, but I'm late for work.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

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Why did the Asian boy drop his milk? Because he had a stroke.

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Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

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what did the african man have for breakfast? Ebola cereal.

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A Guitar is an instrument. As far as you know...

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What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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What did the man do when he went to the toilet went toilet

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Why does a man have a closet full of fruits? Because he has a mental illness and there is nothing to laugh about.

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Whats worse than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork

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A fish walks into a bar. He proceeds to talk the bartender. "Blub blub blub" The fish sitting next to him whispers to the bartender. "What is he talking about." The bartender shrugs.

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What do you call a Man who likes little childeren A Nittany Lion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops