Roses are red Violets are blue I have altzhiemers Cheese on toast.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

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What happend to the girl who went to school dreased ugly She took the other students advice and whent home and killed her self

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Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

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Should a pole bump an alarm?

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

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Why was the little boy sad Because he has depression from his father beating him over and over every time he comes home from school...

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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Want to hear a joke You're Adopted

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Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

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Knock knock? Who's there? Herpes. Bummer.

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Why are people attacking the Jews we gave you so much things like: Television (Thomas Edison) Electricity (Thomas Edison) Weapons (Arvin Humbergs) Wifi (Edcolsin Vinstein) Be gr8 ful without us your nothing

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I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

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When life gives you ponies... get a new life!

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whats a bike and rhymes with mike?

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What word starts with "f" and ends with "uck"? Firetruck!

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blonde: your cute Gangster: wanna go back to my crib blonde: you mean you can go back in time?

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What's worse than Patrick in a blender. Uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, idk.

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So give me head, or I queue you!

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Here is a nursery rhyme: Jane is a scruff, she has a head full of nits. She also had pain in her great big... Now don't get excited. Don't be mislead. Because all that Jane had was a pain in her head!

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What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops