Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

can you touch your toes? no

roses are red violets are blue does this smell like chloroform

Q-What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? A-Where's my tractor?

How do you confuse a Muslim? - Rub his belly.

Lucy laughed at the joke. Then realised she had gangrene.

Q: what did batman say to robin before they got into the car? A: get in the car (:

Why don't nuns wear bras? Because god supports everything!

Q: What's the best way to satisfy your hunger A: Eat

A man walks into a bar, I forget the rest of this joke and your mother's a whore.

Mikey : I wan to divorce. Miney :are u funking crazy Mikey : no I'm funking dazy !

Yo moma so fat, it ain't even funny. Seriously. She is suffering real diabetes! Do you know how that feels? I though so...

what do you call it when justin beiber makes a sex tape with selina gomez? lesbian porn.

Whats not funny and no one wants to waste the time to reading it? This joke

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

How do you know when a Captcha defect causes you to post the same anti-joke three times? Canteloupe.

Women. One of the genders a human can be.

A black man walks into KFC. the whole room..THE GAME.

A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

Whats the difference between Obama and Hitler? One is the President of the United States The other is a fascist dictator that killed millions.

jesus can walk on water but chuck norris can swim through land

If a guy has a sex change what is the first thing he would say? Boobies!

What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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