I'm going to live to be 300 years old or die trying!

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Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He had a stroke.

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Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

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Q: What do dogs and wind have in common? A: They're both blue. Except the dog. Or the wind. Wind is colorless.

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Where did Jonathon go after he died? - Burger King, he died from diabetes

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What did the little girl buy for her cat? A box to bury him in.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

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What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

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No because your face is really f***** up.

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Why didn't the cat eat its dinner? Because I nailed its head to the floor.

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What Do You Call a Hawk in Virginia? A Hawk What Do you Call a Hawk that lives in Virginia? Virginan Hawk

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whats worse than the holocaust? i don't know, the holocaust was pretty bad.

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rocky is staring at us from outside...

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Why was the dinosaur laughing so hard? He heard a very humorous joke

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How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

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I got a boner from the waitress touching my shoulder, please dislike this

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Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

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Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

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What is similar between a horse and a zebra? - If you chopped of there heads, they would die.

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roses are brown violets are brown who shit on my garden?

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What is the color of your spleen? I dont know i'm not a doctor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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