- Anti Joke

How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

How many cops does it take to change a lightb- [Beaten to death by cops]

A bartender walks into a bar. About 8 hours later, he goes home.

Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

Why did Little Jimmy cross the road? Little Jimmy doesnt have arms and legs, silly, he cant cross the road.

What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

If you are swimming in a tree how many dogs does it take to crack a duck? The answer is 4 because nothing rhymes with orange

Stop driving smart cars you fags

3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To achieve his goal on the other side of the road. Being a chicken he is not aware of the arm a fast traveling motor vehicle can bring to him.

Why do black people have white hands and feet? Regardless of race or ethnicity, the skin on the palms and soles of the feet is always less pigmented than elsewhere on the body. In darker skinned people this fact is readily observable, but in light skinned people this feature of human biology cannot normally be discerned by simple visual inspection.

what dyu call a jew on the moon? a problem. what dyu call ten jews on the moon? a bigger problem. what dyu call all the jews on the moon? problem solved.

Joe: Will you remember me tomorrow? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next week? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next month? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next year? Mack: Yes Joe: Knock knock Mack: Who's there? Joe: See you forgot me already! Mack: No I didn't Joe, I thought you were going to tell me a knock knock joke. :/

What do you do with a leg less dog? Take him for a drag.

How many people of a certain demographic does it take to change a light bulb? x+1 (x >0), 1 person to change the lightbulb and x to behave in a manner consistent with the established stereotype of said demographic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What happened to the blind boy? He went deaf.. helen kellered....

Knock-Knock Come in! ...

Why was 6 afraid of seven? well if 7 8 9 then what happened to the rest?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

I had friends on the Death Star.

what did the african say when he got cancer? what? i don't know, he said it in african.

Q: What's Funnier than a baby spinning around a pole at 300 MPH? A: Stopping it with a shovel.

wanna hear a dirty joke? ...trashcan

Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: He got hit by an axe.