Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his red tractor?

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What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

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Bible Fact0idz: "Something Drink my blood and consume my flesh and live forever something" Jesus- dead age 30something alcoholism liver problems and diabeetus at time of death, crucified and not been seen since, return pending? Classified Alcoholic. Moral: "YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

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What do you get when you mix hydrochloric acid and a humans digestive track? Death.

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What's red and green and goes 100mph? A frog in a vehicle on the Autobahn.

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Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. He did kill Hitler.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

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What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What's funnier than 24? Many things, the number 24 is not very humorous.

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Two straight men walk into a gay bar. They quickly realize their mistake and cross the street to the tavern where they enjoy a beer and some pretzels.

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Why was the girl sad? Because borat came had DA SEXI TIME with yo mother in law:)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC and join his chicken friends to protest.

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Why did the man write with a pen on paper? Because he was writing a novel.

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Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin "Boy, it sure is getting hot in here," and the other muffin replies "yeah, that's because it's an oven."

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What time is it? I just looked at my clock on the wall. It is 9:14 AM Eastern Standard Time.

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You had better thumbs up this post.

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Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

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What did the horse say to the cow? Nothing because animals cannot speak.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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