Q: What do you call a gay man in a... A: Keith.

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you just read an anti-joke

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A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

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Your mom is so fat, that your gonna get a brother soon.

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Why aren't anti jokes funny? Idk. Watermelon in your pants, you're adopted.

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An under aged girl walks into a bar. She couldn't have done so without a fake ID and early development.

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What do you get when an elephant and a pig have baby? Nothing, mating between animals must take place between animals of the same species, thus making it impossible to cross these two animals

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I obviusly meant: Have you ever seen a cow chasing boots? Because the one with the cowboy chasing boots doesn't make sense...

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you...

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How do you get a bird off the roof you throw an ax at it

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What do you call somebody who can't walk? Handicapped

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing, you heartless asshole.

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Knock knock. *Silence Knock knock *silence Knock knock *Silence KNOCK KNOCK. *Silence (Busts open door) Oh right I murdered Billy a week ago

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

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A princess decided to kiss a frog in the hopes that it would turn into a handsome prince, as she found none of her suitors to her taste. The frog was incredibly poisonous and she died of total organ failure three days later.

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A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

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the next time someone says "yolo" im going to pull out my shotgun and reply "sadly..."

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What's the difference between a melon and a baby? You have to cut open the melon before you can eat it

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

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what is blue and fuzzy? Blue Fuzz

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'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' That's fantastic because Peter Piper was paralyzed and the doctors said he would never be able tomove is arms or legs again, and there he is picking a peck of pickled peppers. I applaud you Peter Piper.

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What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

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Why don't Batman go to an Ozzy Osbourne concert? Because Batman doesn't exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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