If you are what you eat, then imagine a prostitute.

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What do you can a boy with no arms and no legs? Names!

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Knock knock. who's there? your dead cat, here you go.

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Whats black and white all over? Michael Jackson

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Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

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Why did the hipster burn his tongue? The tea he was drinking was at an unsuitable temperature for consumption resulting in the scalding of his mouth.

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" "It's Mr. Johnson, your next door neighbor." "Come on in."

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Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

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Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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Nero, I mean it, I want you and your wife to have 15 million dollars, it wont buy you the happiness you seek, but it helps no?

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What's the worst part about being a black Jew? You have to sit at the back of the oven.

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Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

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Why is red? He was just murmured by a phycopath.

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Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

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What do you call a poor Donald Trump? Donald Trump

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the dog cross the road? To eat the chicken. Why did the police officer cross the road? To tranquilize the dog and the chicken.

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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Sam murray got home after school one day, he siad hello to his father and possibly played some Avatar on the D.S

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops