What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson bleeding, I spelled " red" wrong

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What's the difference between a piece of chicken and a black guy? One is delicious and the other isn't good for your health.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he's CHICKEN.

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Whats the most fun thing you can do with hangers and a vaccum cleaner? -abort babies

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A American, a Brit and a Mexican decided to bet on who could tell the funniest joke. The one that won told a great joke indeed.

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My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? The pizza does not scream in the oven

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Why was the boy in the hospital? He was visiting his grandmother, she had cancer and the doctor gave her 3 months to live.

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How long does it take a person to steal a television? Many variables could determine said ability to successfully steal a television. Such variables depend on sub-variables such as weight of the television, whether the television is a store, an upper-class citizen's home, or in a "ghetto" apartment. A main variable could be the race of the thief in question. African Americans are scientifically more likely to steal a television faster compared to a Caucasian. Yet a downside to being an African American is the fact that they are more likely to be called in for questioning or arrested on the spot at their broken down home. Caucasians are less likely to be questioned and if caught will most likely obtain the proper amount of bribery money in which to pay off the police.

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Knock knock? Whose there? Colin Come in

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Have you ever seen that gay clown in asda.

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How hard is it to cross a man with a tree? Jesus only needed a few nails

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Q: Why did Captain Kirk suck his own dick? A: Nobody else was around, I guess.

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Q: What's the difference between a bird and a fly? A: A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird.

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It sucks if you have amnesia. It sucks if you have amnesia.

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What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

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A black guy, a mexican, and a jew walk in a bar. The mexican had to go to the bathroom. He asked the bartender where the bathroom was and she directed him down the hall where he pooped in quietly.

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Stat1st1cs sh0w 0ne 1n f1ve pe0ple d0n't understand b1nary

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what do you call a polar bear in a bathtub? No soap, radio

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Why did the ship get lost at sea? The captain was a piece of bread.

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Whats the saddest part about the sandy hook shooting? There were still bullets in the clip... Im going to hell by the way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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