- Anti Joke

Why did the hobo break both of his arms? He didn't like them.

What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

Q.Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A.Because chickens weren't invented then.

Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

Why didn't jimmy get to eat his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

Why was the kid running around? He was on fire

Q. What is Black, White, and Red all over?? A. A girl just having sex and her Cherry broke all over your dick..

What do you call the white woman who bought kool-aid for a black man. a good friend.

Q:what's worse than eating outdated raviolis? A:terminal cancer.

an elephant is like a guy but its nose is the di**

Why did the man fall over? He was blind.

What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

So there's a monkey in a bar. I forgot the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

Why couldn't the black man play hockey in college? He died of cancer while still in high school.

Why did the chicken cross the roard? There were no cars in the immediate vacinity and the chicken therefore came to a logical conclusion that it was a rational theorem on which crossing the road could be based.

To clowns walk into a bar. They don't notice each other because as soon as they walk to a 5-yard radius, the length that was said to be the range of a clowns eyesight (which was actually said by a controversial scientist, looked on as a madman; he created a whole clown-eyesight-range conspiracy), when a fire starts, creating a huge apocalyptic event. However, the two clowns go into the bar unphased. Both clowns then turn opposite directions. The clown on the right sits down with his drink and takes out his book about the Victorian Era. He constantly checks his watch. The clown on the left disapears into the croud, and steals french fries from table 36. After three hours, they both walk to the back of the bar, simultaneously tying their shoes not noticing their similarity in career choices. They both open a door marked PRIVATE (while tying their shoes). After sixteen days of exactly the same thing happening repeatedly... Both clowns see eachother on the way out of the bar. Little do the know that they are being watched by the scientist I mentioned earlier. Two Years Later Both clowns die instantly after being attacked by a giant war hammer-wielding octopus on the way home from the circus.

What do you call a bloody Jewish guy nailed to a piece of wood. Jesus

What did the Triceratops get for his birthday? Nothing. Dinosaurs are extinct.

Man walks into Malaysian Airlines "Hey, can I have the next flight to--" "This is our only policy! You pay the fare we pick the where."

(Insert short question here) (Insert long semi-irrelevant answer here)

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He stepped on a piece of a shattered bottle from a bar fight. Don't worry, though, it was just a little cut and he felt fine after a few beers.

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad that this joke took your mind off your terminal cancer?

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: That depends how hard you throw them... Q: Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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