Your sister's feet smell so bad people encourage her to go home and wash them.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

How do you make someone stop talking? Shove a rock down their throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Wgat did the umpire say to the asian batter? Foul ricebowl!

thumb_up thumb_down -55

What do you call a woman who has huge breasts? Sarah, for instance.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

thumb_up thumb_down -59

What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm dying of AIDS so I guess I'm feeling a little sorry for myself"

thumb_up thumb_down +62

What's the difference between an orange? A duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

What is the difference between finding a dead black man on the street or a dead dog? There are tire marks in front of the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What do you call a black man with a speech impediment? By his name.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What word starts with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? Nagger

thumb_up thumb_down +42

roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

thumb_up thumb_down +42

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

:) Hey AMBY VALENT! Want to join our horsehead show below?? *Laughing track with that fat loud bitch that wont stop laughing making the actors stare at each other like douches* :/ Muuh, I dont really care im just some meh character anyway so yuh...' *Laughing track* ? ???? ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA! :( Hey get outta our show here you China man! *OOOH! Track plays with some fa*ott whistling* ? ???? | Baka! *leaves* *Awww track plays* *Laughing track*

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is an Italian pastry with tomato sauce, cheese and other toppings and the other is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

How did the newborn baby come out of a man? It was ejaculated as a sperm from his testicles

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What did the apple say to the banana. Nothing fruits cant talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What's cooler than living on the sun? Everything, because the sun is the hottest entity in the entire universe. Plus, who'd want to live on the sun?

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Those who can't teach... Aren't teachers.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Compton

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What's worse than stabbing your eye with a fork? Stabbing both your eyes with a fork.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

whats your budget like? a budget.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops