A man walks into a bar. He drinks heavily and dies of alcohol poisoning.

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Nero, I have 30 million dollars left, lets split them and leave ground zero behind us, I know it would make me happy to share them with you.

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A horse walks into a bar gets shot then carried away in a helicopter

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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Why did the fungus leave the party? Truffle.

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What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

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Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

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Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

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Three guys walk in to a bar. One got a concussion.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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Every week or so Chuck Norris does his laundry.

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because Osama bin Laden is dead.

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what do you get when you combine a vampire,werewolf,and whiny girlfriend ....... the worst show in the history of the earth

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A Finn, a Swede and A Norwegian went to an island. The Norwegian shot them all.

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How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

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sdfrgtyuki

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What's the ultimtate guerilla camoflauge at night time? Black people.

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>>---------------------------------[ knee ]------------------------->>>

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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how do you make a plumber cry?.... kill his family

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"hey do you know the date" "58"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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