Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

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Why did the world end? Because of Jim Layhey's whispering winds of shit.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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A man walks into a bar

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sean punches bryce in the face, sean then says ow you just punched me in the face. that hurt

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

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What's faster than a black man with a TV? olympic sprinters, cyclists, street legal cars, speed boats, helicopters, commercial airliners, bullets, fighters jets, missiles, SR-71, space shuttles, rocket ships, anything in orbit, excited electrons, and quite a lot more, actually.

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Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

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chinga tue madre Ryan

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Yeah sure comment below, and soylent green is fucking people! Moral: "You are judging the spitting image of yourself, except that you are doomed to remain ignorant and judgmental"

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Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

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why did annie fall of the swing? she had no arms.. knock knock who's there? not annie.

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whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

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yo mama is so fat she has more body mass than a skinny person

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Whats Funnier than a clown? Woman's Basketball.

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What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

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What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

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Drew Knowles is gay

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Your name is Fired, your Boss comes up to you and says "Your Fired" You say "I know my name." Your boss gets mad and throws you in a chimney

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

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Why did the old lady have a heart attack? She got raped by a giraffe.

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Up High. *high fives* In The Middle *high fives* Down Low *high fives* In the Grass *high fives* You've been diagnosed with prostate cancer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Still the Holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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